Faith Like A Mustard Seed

"Then sings my soul, my Savior God, to thee

How great Thou art, how great Thou art.

Then sings my soul, my Savior God, to thee

How great Thou art, how great Thou art."

The air is crisp and clean, I wrap my sweater a little closer and close my eyes. A smile dances its way across my cheeks and I can't help it. The birds sing endlessly, the trees ruffle softly and I feel You're nearness. It's been too long. Unbelief has been my constant companion, feeding bits of poison into my subconscious and nagging at my conscience. This heart, restless and running, gasping for breath, finally slowed down, and in those moments of quiet, the choice came. Would I entertain distraction, or fight for a moment in You're presence?
Closed toed shoes grip the wooden floor and rock the swing, slowly, back and forth. Summer has officially become a memory and thus the transition into Autumn begins. Out in the open air, it seems easier to open my heart to You. My head is cleared of manmade distractions and I breathe in You're wonders, drink in the sights and smells of tranquil surroundings.
I can't write anything decent and so I pen simplicity, preaching truths to myself, until they sink in. Ink oozes onto the page, straight from my heart, as I start to feel awake again. You put a song in my head and for some reason I search for the lyrics. In the stillness of solitude I sing them out, these marvelous words that match the happy musings on my heart. I understand it then, that it isn't about me. It isn't my world, it's Yours.
Faith comes like a waterfall when I point my eyes and heart in the right direction. Thoughts of how You created this world, man out of dust, breathed it all into existence with the sound of You're voice...these thoughts continue to wake me up. Belief builds, unbelief dies. Doubts shatter at the remembrance of You're greatness and I am filled with a joy unspeakable, one that does not depend on circumstance.

"O Lord my God, when I in awesome wonder

Consider all the works thy hands have made

I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder

Thy power throughout the universe displayed."

"When through the woods, and forest glades I wander

And hear the birds sing sweetly in the trees

When I look down, from lofty mountain grandeur 

And see the brook, and feel the gentle breeze."

"And when I think, that God His Son not sparing

Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in

That on the cross, my burden gladly bearing

He bled and died to take away my sin."

True satisfaction comes only from the saturation of mind and heart, in the person of Christ. The reality that I am here for You're purposes and not my own cannot be emphasized enough. You are the reason for all of this. You are the reason. You are the reason! How often do I get caught up in my own selfishness and then cast the blame on You for being distant? And You forgive me? Again and again, you pull me near? 

What if all of my dreams have died and continue to die? It doesn't matter. What if people let me down, over and over again? It doesn't matter. What if circumstance is ugly? It doesn't matter! You are the reason for all of this and no matter what I tell myself, it's not about me.

My faith is small, yes. It's about as impressive as a mustard seed, but I'm planting that thing in the dirt and I believe and see that it is and will continue to grow into something stronger, strong enough to tell mountains what to do and they will listen.

 He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. " ~Matthew 17:20